Ten Stupid Things I'm Worried About Right Now

And how it feels like autonomy in a world on fire.

My nervous system has been trying to kill me.

One minute we’re regulated, everything is copasetic, the next we’re spinning out over an ant discovered on the kitchen counter. How the fuck did you get in here and where are your friends hiding?!

Between traveling, putting out little fires everywhere, and the onslaught of breaking news from that one guy on TikTok, I’m barely keeping it together. The second I feel joy or excitement about something, I remember that the world is on fire and worry that none of it matters, anyway. I am collecting fears.

I feel like if I see another Ten Ways To Elevate Your Self-Care Routine post I will grow horns and start spitting fire out of every orifice. So, in lieu of that, I offer you Ten Stupid Things I’m Worried About Right Now.

-Soon we will all be dust and my audition for that new ABC drama series will burn along with the dozens of others saved to a file named Submissions 2025 on my laptop. This one actually brings me some relief because I’m also pretty worried that I’m a terrible actor. Oh shit, am I a terrible writer, too?

-My water will become contaminated and I’ll unknowingly drink the poisonous liquid, infecting myself with some sort of disgusting bacteria that will kill me slowly. Ok, to be fair, last night my water went out unexpectedly and the local utility department posted a warning to their Facebook page that my area should boil all water meant for human consumption until further testing was conducted. I decided to risk it and brush my teeth before bed, I’ll let you know if I start melting or foaming at the mouth.